Letters to our Children: Gavin

Oh sweet Gavin.

As I sit down to type this I am coming down off of a few frustrating moments regarding the amount of lunch you ate (or lack thereof) and whether or not you chose to eat or chose to rest. I ended up making the decision for you and you are now resting on the couch. Sweet boy, you challenge me in ways that I never thought possible, but then in the same breath, same blink of an eye, you can melt my heart completely.

Moments after you were born, the doctor proclaimed "it's a boy!" and I burst into tears with happiness and joy. I was excited to have a little boy and a little brother for Sydney. I never had a brother and I always wondered what it would be like. However, I also remember being nervous about raising a little boy. I was nervous about the fearlessness that often comes so naturally for little boys. I'm a cautious person by nature, sensitive, and not terribly outgoing. Sydney is very similar. I knew that you would be your very own little person (probably more like your dad!)....I was right. And I have loved every minute of watching you grow and explore and change and learn and love. You were the sweetest baby and loved to snuggle. I worried that you would outgrow that, but I am thankful that you haven't. You were not very interested in sitting and reading stories (like Sydney was from the get-go), you were always on the go exploring new toys and new things. It wasn't until you were probably a year and a half that you finally would sit still for a book or to try a puzzle--I loved that time with you! (You are still constantly on the go...you go "super speed" all day until your head hits the pillow at night. It never takes you long to fall asleep--and you are always the first one to wake up in the morning!) Now you enjoy reading and you are the puzzle master! I think you have more puzzles in your room than most 3 year old little boys, that is for sure. Sometimes, when you're quiet, I will frantically run to check on you (because you have been known to cause some mischief...), but sometimes, I will find you sitting quietly with a book or two, or three and on occasion a puzzle or two. I love those moments. I love working on puzzles with you but mostly I like sitting back and watching you as your mind gets to work and "solves" the puzzle. You are clever and creative and persistent. You hate being pulled from something before it is completed (a puzzle, a game, a book, a show) and oftentimes you will scramble to finish it up simply so it can be done before you leave it. It drives me crazy sometimes, but I try to just roll with it. It's who you are (and who your dad is as well) and even though it may be something that causes me some grief now, I know it's a trait that will take you far. You love to play hard and rough house, but you also love to love on your family members (and will even pass out hugs to people you just met!) Those who meet you can't help but love you and fall for those baby blue eyes of yours that contain just the right amounts of charm and orneriness. You love playing with Sydney and miss her terribly while she is at school. Once she is home, I don't usually see the two of you unless a problem arises. Both of you are off together playing dinosaur land or trucks or trains or if you're outside, she loves to push you on the tire swing! You let out the most amazing laugh...it is contagious. It melts me when I see the two of you play so well together!

Currently you are in your second month of preschool and I am slowly starting to accept the fact that you are growing up! "That's what happens" your dad says, "kids grow up." It isn't as black and white for me because in my mind you are still my little baby boy. However, seeing you love and enjoy and thrive in school makes my heart so happy. You are doing such a great job in preschool and usually like to tell me about your days and sing the Goodbye Song for me. (Except the other day you politely said "can you stop talking to me please?" while we were driving home. ;) How can I argue with that?!) Now that we have Avery and you are no longer the official baby of the house, I view you more as my "little" boy than my baby boy and it's okay. I have loved watching you take over your new role as big brother to Avery. She adores you and smiles so brightly at you, sometimes when you don't even notice she's doing it. You give her the sweetest kisses and loves and again, it melts me.

So dear Gavin, thank you for bringing so much adventure and spunk to our lives. I am honored to be your mom and to watch you become an amazing little man. There is so much that lies ahead for you and I am excited to be a part of your journey! I love you more than you will ever know!

Love,
Mom