Avery, Avery, Avery

You have been busy the last month or so, my little lady! All within one week (at the beginning of May) you went from pushing yourself up from sitting to standing (Cinco de Mayo... Ole! at teeball practice-Brooke you witnessed it! ;)) to the very next day taking your first steps to Daddy. The next few weeks you took a little hiatus from trying to walk, but Memorial Day weekend, you started stepping everywhere. Now you try to walk whenever you can and are actually quite determined to do so! If you fall, you calmly pop right back up and start walking again. Between you, your brother and your sister, you are probably our most steady walker so far. You did a lot of standing before you ever started taking any steps, which I think has helped you! You learned to balance and to "fall" back to your behind if you lost your balance. (Sydney still thinks you are falling however and swoops in to rescue you-which you hate by the way!) Dad and I were wondering when you would start walking, but you have always been our content little A. Happy to just go with the flow and hang out and watch. So my theory is that you have been taking your time, watching, observing, and testing yourself just enough before putting it all together in that beautiful mind of yours. Then once you had it all figured out, it just clicked and you took off!

 It has been so much fun watching you grow and change! A few other new things of yours is that you like to snuggle us! Before you would only snuggle at sleep-times, but now it is almost as if you *want* to rest your head on our shoulders. I love those moments. You are jabbering a lot more now and voicing/showing your displeasure by hitting, trying to bite, or screeching. Yeah...those aren't so fun. However, we know that it's your only way to communicate with us right now, and before long we will get to hear all about how unhappy you are with us. You have two older siblings who do a phenomenal job of doing just that. ;)

We love you, our sweet girl! xoxo

 Back when you just stood...

 The day you really started walking everywhere at Grandma Dodo's!

 Now we can't stop you. Look at that face..."I...

 "...want that..."

"...camera!"

"It takes a village..."

I heard this phrase while growing up and never really understood the truth behind it until having children of my own after moving away from the only home I had ever known. I grew up with what my husband refers to as a somewhat "utopia" childhood, literally surrounded by family. I lived in an extremely small town with all of my dad's side of the family (grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins) living within a handful of blocks and a couple of gravel roads from each other. Every morning I would walk two houses up the street to school (sometimes with my mom who was a teacher in the same school)-sometimes if my grandpa happened to be driving his bus by our house when he saw us leaving, he would pick me up and give me a "ride" to school in the bus  (yes, literally half a block away! but oh what fun for a "town kid" to experience riding the bus!) After school, I would walk across the street to my grandma's house where she would spoil her grandkids with sweet treats until my mom came to get us. Every birthday and holiday was celebrated with grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, along with the weekly get together at Grandma's house after church on Sundays. I could truly walk or ride my bike anywhere I wanted to go and not have to worry much about traffic. The only really busy road that I had to cross was the one that eventually turned into gravel as it headed west out of town. My parents had babysitters watch us, but we were never short on having sleepovers at Grandma's or a cousin's house. Our neighbors had kids our age and we would play for hours upon hours outside at their house or at our house, making forts in the shelter belt behind our house or playing hide and seek in their yard. I knew no other life than this and it was a great one-one that I envisioned and hoped for for my own kids some day.

I eventually grew up, met Joe and realized that, gasp, not everyone had a childhood quite like mine. In fact, it is a reality for some to barely know your first cousins and to rarely ever see your aunts and uncles. It's an unfortunate reality that sometimes, grandparents pass away before you get to know them, let alone meet them. It is the reality for some that your own little, nuclear family is the only family that you have in town, or in your "city" (Manhattan) as it was for Joe. So it would be quite accurate to say that Joe and I's childhoods pretty much land on the opposite ends of the childhood spectrum.

Fast forward several years, we had Sydney and the first few years of her life, I was still wanting my childhood for her (and eventually for Gavin), even though logically I knew, that it just wasn't possible. Geography made it impossible. Jobs and school made it impossible. It took me several years to accept the fact that our kids wouldn't have the childhood that I had...and that it would be okay. We have lived in Ottawa now for almost seven years (in July!) and Joe and I can truly say that we feel established here. Our children don't have the same family experiences that I had growing up, but it's okay. We are beyond blessed with a village of friends and neighbors who love our family and will, and have, jumped to be at our side to help us in any way they can. Our kids play with our neighbor kids late into the evening just as we used to. We have neighbors who will bless us with holiday baskets, Easter treats, and muffins for the road during a really rough week. (Who will also offer on a whim to watch our kids while we have an adult anniversary dinner.) Friends who go to school to eat lunch with their own child, but will see our sweet Sydney and share a smile with her, a friendly wave, and a conversation (and then report back to us how they enjoyed seeing our sweet girl). Friends who will offer to have their older children walk Sydney out of school so I don't have to unload everybody...or friends who will pick Sydney up from school and take her to gymnastics so I don't have to unload everybody. Friends who will come over to watch our kids so we can go to conferences or I can go grocery shopping while Joe is working. The list of thankfulness goes on and on.  Believe me, I still miss the fact that our children won't have the same experiences of my childhood and the feeling of living so close to grandparents and cousins. I hate that we miss out on a lot of family things because of distance. However, I/we have come to peace with how it is and though we may not be surrounded by our blood family, we are surrounded by wonderful people who make up our "village" and we are incredibly blessed by that.

Happy Birthday Avery!

My dear youngest daughter,

I don't even know where to begin. You are officially a year old today. It does not even seem possible-the year flew by. Throughout the day, I keep flashing back to what I was doing exactly a year ago, beginning with when I was up with you at 5 to feed you, to making you birthday pancakes around 8:00 (for those curious ones, around that time I was probably waiting on the call back from the OB nurse and still debating on whether to even go to the hospital or not!). When I laid you down for your morning nap, I recalled, that by that time, the nurse had advised me to come in, I had called everyone on my "flow chart" and people were coming to watch your sister and brother, someone was coming to get me to take "us" to the hospital, and your dad was planning on meeting us there. And now, I sit here and look at the clock and see that it's 2:34 p.m. You were born exactly nine minutes from now. You came into this world and stole our hearts and continue to do so today.

Honestly, I remember a time when we just had Sydney and Gavin and I felt "good" with our little family of four. (Which is why I sold some maternity clothes and baby things! oops!) However, your dad and I knew we would always wonder about having a third child, we agreed that if we looked down the road (past the sleepless nights and pregnancy and delivery, etc.) that ultimately we wanted a bigger family. BUT, I was nervous to start all over again, nervous about things that could potentially go wrong, worried that I couldn't split my attention and love yet again, plus a few other unimportant, yet valid, logistical questions that I had floating around in my head. We took a leap of faith and I am so, so glad that we did. We are blessed beyond words to call you our very own and you have completed our family in every possible way. I feel completely content when I look at our little family and when I see you interact with your sister and brother (and they with you). It melts my heart every single time. The past year has been busy and crazy, but it has been the very best kind of crazy! And it's only going to get crazier... :) Happy first birthday precious, sweet Avery. We love you more than you will ever know!

Dear Gavin

Happy Birthday month! This time four years ago I had the slightest inkling and a few signs pointing to your imminent arrival, but we had no idea whether we'd be blessed with another little princess or blessed with a little boy. You were born on a warm morning on April 3rd, and the moment the doctor announced "it's a boy!" is one that I will never forget. You came to us Easter weekend-a weekend that we celebrate the risen Lord and the promise of new life. I know this was all a part of God's plan for you! You were sent to us during a bittersweet time, but I know in my heart that you were sent to us to help us focus on LIFE and all the beautiful parts of it....to bring us joy (and you do!), smiles and hearty laughs (an abundance of them!), sass and mischief (you've got them covered ;)), snuggles and love. We cherish you more than you will ever know and we enjoy every single day with you!

Looking at your first pictures down below, I know that we had no idea what kind of a ride we would take with you or the kind of little person you would grow to become. You are a little man who loves to snuggle and will often run up to me or Dad (or another family member) and give the biggest hug and a little shake (your "snuggle"); you are very particular and need to have things in order...sometimes you like surprises and sometimes you don't (it depends on what the surprise is!); you love puzzles and will often pull out all of the puzzles that you own and just go through the stack working on them; you love UNO and have become really good at playing it; you love books! Sometimes I will search for you-because it's quiet-and find you reading a book in your room. Books about dinosaurs, trains, and trucks are your favorites. You have discovered a love for monster trucks, "hunting", and fishing. You LOVE fishing for crappie and bass with your dad. One of your favorite fishing stories to share is when you went fishing with Dad and Sydney and you guys got a "huge snapping turtle!" You love to eat and always seem to be hungry. You love to play outside-climbing, exploring, digging, finding rocks/bugs/worms/footprints. You can always put a smile on someone's face and I cannot wait to watch you continue to grow and change! We are blessed beyond measure to call you ours, sweet boy!

Happy early birthday, Gavin!
Love you always,
Mom

Dear Sydney

 Dearest Sydney,
What a month this has been for you! A couple of weeks ago you performed in your very first "show" at school called "Swamped!" I was not surprised in the least when, from the list of twenty or more characters to dress as, you chose the butterfly. One Wednesday, your early release day, we had fun painting the little styrofoam balls and twisting and curling pipe cleaners for your antennae. We could spot you from the back of the gymnasium with your bobbing antennae! All week long, you sang your songs for us and you sang them with pride. I hope you always do this! Be confident and find joy in what you do and share it with others. You brought us much needed joy these past few weeks.

Our proud performer!

Another momentous occasion took place just last night.You've been wiggling a loose tooth for about a month now and we were faced with a pretty tough choice yesterday. Keep wiggling it or just pull it! Yesterday at supper your top teeth kept bumping it as you were chewing (because it was SO loose!) and it hurt and stung and you got upset. So finally, Dad just made the executive decision to pull it. I wasn't there-I was upstairs with Avery, but we heard the whole thing. ;) You were so nervous and worried it was going to hurt. You even tried to run away and talk Dad out of it! However, your dad stood firm, wrapped some floss around it and pulled it out. (The following is what you told me just this morning about what Dad said to you...)
once it was out...
Dad: so, did it hurt?
Sydney: no!
Dad: *lifting the floss with the tooth dangling from it* you just lost your first tooth.
Sydney: "then the happiness started!"

You were the proudest little person I have ever seen with that lost tooth and gaping hole in your mouth. Of course, the happy times were soon to be accompanied with some worry and sadness. You took your tooth in to the bathroom to brush it and clean it for the tooth fairy (unbeknownst to us) and it ended up going down the drain. (Sidenote: This is the kind of scenario that proves that you are truly my daughter in every way. I am sorry to have passed this gene on to you! To devise a plan with the best of intentions and then have it backfire completely, is exactly something that would happen to me too.) You were truly devastated and heartbroken and so were we! However, your amazing dad set to work and literally disassembled the bathroom pipes to search for the tooth. Many tears, pajamas, hugs, and one letter of explanation to the Tooth Fairy later, your dad called you in to the bathroom to say he had found your tooth! (You told me a bit later "I have the most amazing dad in the whole world." Yes, you do-and he would do it for you all over again in a heartbeat!) Then we all had tears of happiness because we saw how relieved and ecstatic you were, Sydney! Finally, all was right in your world again and we could settle in for the night and you could dream about the Tooth Fairy's arrival. I think we learned a lesson or two, so hopefully future tooth losses aren't fraught with so much excitement. How many more teeth to go?....

The proud 6 year old: lost tooth bagged and her new tooth peeking through!

Love you so much Sydney. You make us so proud and you bring us smiles and heartwarming moments, every day!
Love,
Mom

Dear Avery,

We are approaching the end of your eleventh month and you have been so busy (and keeping US busy!) You have done a lot of growing this past month and it has been exciting to be a part of!

• Just within the last few weeks you have found your voice
• started moving more (from army crawling to regular crawling, to pulling yourself up, to cruising, to just wanting to stand on your own!) 
• If there is a crumb, or a fuzzy, or a piece of bark from firewood, or a small toy, or a piece of paper, or a seed (happened today!)...you will find it. You'll crawl right past the most interesting toy in the house to get that little piece of something. :) 
• You are shaking your head when you say "dada"
• make cheesy, funny grins
• shriek when you want more of something or are just unhappy
• have thrown a couple of mini-tantrums already when I have taken something away
• have shut your fingers in a drawer a couple of times already
• you are tired of the exersaucer and you want to be in the middle of everything all of the time (much to Gavin's dismay!)
• Dad lowered your crib mattress because this weekend, I woke to you saying "dada" and peeking at us over the crib railing! 
• You have decided you don't want baby food anymore-flat out refused it! Bananas are your most favorite food and you fussed last night when you saw that Sydney and Gavin were getting one--so guess who also got a banana?
• clapping, blowing kisses, and giving kisses are some new tricks of yours!

I cannot believe we are a few short weeks away from celebrating your first birthday. This has been the fastest year of my life, but one of the most amazing. Avery Jordann, you complete our family in every way and I am so thankful that we can call you our very own!
Love you...Mom

Dearest Sweet Sydney,

I have been meaning to write this down somewhere so I can remember it forever and ever, so here goes.

In school, the parent/teacher organization puts together a "Holiday Shoppe" for kids to bring money and shop for loved ones. The only rule is that you have to buy for others, not yourself. You took six dollars this year (each gift is $1) and you chose to buy gifts for Gavin, Avery, Dad, Aunt Bailey, Uncle Derrick, and me. (The day you came home with Uncle Derrick's gift, we literally ran home, put it in his Christmas care package and ran down to the post office to send it off to him! So I never even got to see it!)

Christmas morning we got to open up these precious gifts and see what you chose for us. For Avery, you chose a baby teething ring. (The only baby item in the shoppe you said!) Gavin received a green Hot Wheels car (only green car in the shoppe!), Dad received a tool: a screwdriver, Aunt Bailey received a mirror (she always looks so fancy!), and for me you chose a Nutcracker. Can I just say that this gift melted my heart? For the past two years we have gone to see the Nutcracker and oh how I treasure that time with just you and our friends. When I saw this gift from you, I realized how special that time was for you as well. I will cherish this gift for always!

 We always knew you were a thoughtful, generous little person, and your choices for your loved ones shows just that. You really know what we love and what we enjoy and you found joy in the perfect gifts for us. While we love the gifts you found for us, it's the thought and the LOVE in the act of giving that is the most meaningful. You make me so proud--I love you!!!

Love,
Mom